When I first became a mom, I was determined to raise two lady-like little girls. The word fart, would never be uttered out of our polite mouths. Body functions would be done quietly in the bathroom where they belong…Right. Wrong!
I quickly came to the conclusion that farts are just funny! They are…Don’t try and tell me they arn’t! Just admit it, you laugh when someone rips one!
I live a crazy family life and I’m the wackiest one of all of them. My mom came to visit from out of town one weekend. She’s as crazy as I am if you were wondering and she thought it would be cute to buy my girls some Flarp. If you have never played with Flarp, you should. I’m telling you, it’s great! It’s a slime that makes these wonderfully, loud, and realistic farting noises when squished.
We sat at our table, the four of us, and made farting noises all afternoon. We laughed the entire time. I swear to you, wine wasn’t even involved!
I spend the next week, being the immature person I am, walking behind my husband with a ball of slime in my hands, making these cute little squeekers. I casually walk behind the couch as he’s trying to relax, and squeeze that slime with everything inside of me, making a loud earth-shattering rip. He just glances in my direction, gives me a little grin and shakes his head. Yeah, I know. I’m annoying!
On Saturday, he’s working so I decide to have a play date with another mom friend I recently met and her daughter. My girls and I clean the house, prepare the snacks, and yes with some disappointment, put away the Flarp. We don’t want this nice lady and her sweet daughter seeing the real us. They wouldn’t understand. We’re just too weird and disgusting! We wouldn’t want any of our bad habits wearing off on her daughter, right?
They come over, we have a great time. We talk, laugh, share stories, give mom advice as our daughters play together. I finally get them all seated at the table and I turn around to prepare my new friend a cup of coffee. My daughter, without my knowledge gets out the flarp. I hear the first loud rip and I turn around with my mouth open. That’s when I see my new friend. She has a big grin on her face, her leg is literally up in the air, the flarp is in her hand and she says, “Girls, check this one out!”
I’m grinning ear to ear and all I can think of is, “Lady, you and I are meant to be friends!”
