I’m having a hard time believing that we go back to school in two weeks. The summer was too short and I’ve enjoyed every moment of playing out in the sun with my daughters. Today, we did our yearly back to school clothes shopping. I look forward to this every year but I did, admittedly, struggle with patience today.
My daughter is going into the fourth grade. I have a difficult time wrapping my brain around that fact. She is definitely growing up and entering into the tween phase. She is starting to have moments of doubt, where I watch her struggle to find herself. Towards the end of last year, she started growing embarrassed over her clothing. They were too childish and the colors were all wrong. She was adamant about no bright colors or graphic images of little girl’s things, such as flowers or butterflies. If it has pink or flutter sleeves, then it was promptly handed down to her sister. She also adopted this semi-grunge look where she was purposely wearing her jeans that had ripped holes in them and wearing drab worn out t-shirts to look cool. I didn’t say a thing. I went through that same phase and my mom allowed me to be myself.
While hanging out with the other tween girls in our neighborhood, she slowly became obsessed with this clothing store for tweens at the mall. I felt a bit deflated, buying clothes at Kohl’s and Carters are now out of the question. Anyone who knows me well, knows I love to shop but personally loathe the mall. I only shop there on Black Friday in the early morning hours with my mom and her best friend. I’m an online shopper when it comes to clothing and shoes. I know my brands, sizes and return policies. I’m a seasoned shopper just not when it comes to actually stepping foot into the mall.
I agree to take my daughters to this tween shop. We walk into the mall, bombarded by people, bright lights and an overwhelming stimulus that sends my head spinning. My daughters are looking around at this amazing new world with their mouths agape. The music is loud and my oldest daughter starts singing off key as proudly as possible. My youngest starts to dance nearly plowing into a couple attempting to leave. As we trudge through the mall looking for a map, they are bouncing off the walls.
“I want this! I want that! I want to ride that pony car around the mall! I want to try that trampoline! Mom, an arcade! Can we? Can we, please?”
“No!” I snap. “We are here for clothes and only clothes!”
They make a bee line for a kiosk with stuffed animals. Since when did malls have electronic plushy animals that you can ride around or trampolines where you can be suspended by ropes and flip around like a circus performer? This is why I shop online or frequent antique stores.
In the food court, I meet up with my best friend and her daughter. We have a moment to relax and eat lunch. I can tell she’s also frazzled as she repeatedly tells her daughter, “No!”
We make it to the tween shop and our girls, are running to and fro, grabbing onto every plushy, sequined and fancy thing they can find. As I’m barking at them to put the items down, the sales lady is giving me the run down on sales and I’m only half listening. After about fifteen minutes of me coming close to losing my temper, we finally look at clothes. In this aspect, they each choose about every item in the store and I’m desperately looking for price tags.
I watch the sales lady roll her eyes at me after I bark at my daughters who have once again gravitated towards the plushy toys. Now I know I’ve done it. I’ve become that mom who yells at her kids in the department store! I take a deep breath and take our heaping bundle of clothing to the changing room. I attempt to help my daughters take their shirts off. They started protesting.
“Mom, were not babies!”
My oldest daughter tries this adorable trendy dress on. It has what appears to be a plaid coat sewn into the dress where the sleeves tie around the middle, giving it a relaxed look. I can’t make head nor tail of this dress and as I’m fiddling with it, my hand accidentally darts up and jabs her in the chin. She rubs her jaw in annoyance and gives me the evil-eye as I’m apologizing.
It takes me another minute and suddenly, the dress makes sense! It’s actually quite cute on her. She’s beaming with pride and I can tell we have at last, found a style that fits her unique personality. I take another deep breath and remember that this day is supposed to be fun! In my frustration, I forgot to appreciate these moments. I forgot to grow with my girls instead of relying on the familiar.
For the next twenty-minutes, we put together outfits, work everything around our budget and even have enough left over for two sequined personalized lunch boxes! From the next changing room over, I can hear my best friend and her daughter, happily chatting with each other.
After we leave with our bags in hand, our girls see the play area. They start jumping up and down in excitement. We sit in exhaustion and watch them play. They are back to being children again and working out all that pent up energy! Moments like these, are quickly drawing to a close. I needed this reminder, to cherish these childhood memories before they are gone forever!
