My Mom is one of the happiest and friendliest people I have ever known. She is overly outgoing and will talk to anyone. I can’t name you how many times, we have gone out for a girl’s day and she ends up talking to a stranger for an hour. She loves people, especially if they are foreigners. She loves to hear their stories, their opinions, and their lives. She appreciates humankind to the fullest. She’s also a bit innocent though when it comes to speaking to men. She grew up with brothers and she has no reserves in who she speaks to. She has had numerous instances when her over-friendliness has been perceived as mild flirting.
As for me. When I’m speaking to men I’ve just met, I’m friendly but I try not to joke around. I’m a happily married woman and I don’t appreciate being hit on nor would I ever want to give them the wrong signals by accident. That’s just a personal boundary that I have. When my mom is in one of her over-friendly moods, I cringe and pray that nothing she says is going to be taken as an invitation for flirting.
One Sunday afternoon, our entire family gets together for an impromptu Sunday Dinner. My Mom had just ran to the store to pick up groceries. She rushes in the house, red-faced and proceeds to tell us a story that we have forever teased her about. At least, this time, she understood the errors of her way.
My family has always been obsessed with the sitcom, “Seinfeld.” We repeat lines from that show on a regular basis and wish everyone a, “Happy Festivus,” around the holidays. So, my Mom is at the grocery store and she sees a man proudly walk in who looks just like Jason Alexander’s character, “George Costanza.”
He walks in wearing a beige trench coat over Dockers and a button down shirt and she is positively star struck. As she watches him, he is friendly, waving and speaking to everyone as he passes. She is even more enthralled because he even walks and talks like the character. She keeps her distance but follows him around through the store, slightly mystified, wondering if it quite possible was the real actor.
In a strange twist of fate or possibly a planned introduction, she ends up standing behind him in line at the checkout. She knows if she doesn’t act quickly, she’s going to miss out on speaking with him. The only thing he has brought to the register is a lone SoBe drink. He turns around and gives her a wide grin and says, “Hi.”
“Hi!” She replies and points to his SoBe drink. “Soooo…Are those drinks any good? I’ve never had one.”
“Oh, these are delicious!” He says.
They make a bit of small talk and he buys his drink. My mom is still confused over his identity. She is still trying to figure out if this really is George Costanza or just a look-a-like. Moments later, as she’s buying her own groceries, he appears with another SoBe drink. He hands it to her.
“Here, I bought this for you to try!” He says very sweetly and gives her a toothy grin.
She thanks him and he just stands there, waiting for her to say more…waiting for any opportunity.
My mom suddenly realizes, that she’s being flirted with. The reality sets in, she’s being hit on by George Costanza! In all honesty though, the gesture is quite sweet and he hasn’t crossed over any lines. My mom is quite the catch so I can’t blame him one bit. Still though, she knows she needs to exit the situation.
He seems to get the hint that she has nothing more to say to him so he leaves looking rather disappointed. She pays for all her groceries, puts them in the cart and much to her dismay, she sees him in the parking lot…Looking towards the entryway doors, waiting for her.
Panicking she slips out through the side, hides behind a few cars and ends up running at full speed with her cart through the parking lot. She looks behind her, he’s pacing the parking lot with roaming eyes, looking desperately for her. She pops her trunk open, throws the groceries in, shoves her cart out into the lot which is something she would never do and drives off!
As she tells us this story, we’re laughing so hard we can hardly contain it! Even my Dad, is laughing! Of course, we all have to tell her that her over-friendliness backfired on her. To do this day, she swears it was the real actor! Did she meet the real George Costanza at the grocery store in our small town? Did our love for Seinfeld manifest into something we can’t explain? We may never know the truth. Meanwhile, I’ve never been able to drink a SoBe without thinking of Seinfeld and my crazy family!
