I have mentioned in other blog posts of mine that I love being in my thirties. I feel as if I’ve finally let go of all my past burdens and don’t waste time and energy on problems that aren’t worth it. With this freedom, I find I have much more restraint when it comes to getting angry. And let me tell you, I can get angry! But with my new found wisdom, I typically react with a clear head. However, I get irritated really quickly over two areas of my life that honestly should be non-issues. My skin and my hair!
Many years ago, I was a part of a mom’s support group and a woman was angry to the point of tears from all of the unsolicited advice she was receiving. My initial reaction was to join in, to offer her my limited advice but I stopped myself. She simply wanted to make a statement without being bombarded with solutions. Her reaction years later, made an impression on me. In this ridiculous vain area of my life, I know how she felt.
I’ve actually boycotted most hair salons. I’m thirty-five. I have what I feel is a limited time before middle age sets in. I’m not going to waste it! I’m not paying a twenty-two-year-old former model to lecture me on what hair style I should be wearing or how to properly care for my thin blonde hair. I don’t want to be told, I should embrace my gray hairs. I’m paying over a hundred dollars to have them removed. I’m nearly fifteen years your senior, do you think I don’t know the damage foil highlights could possibly cause?
When I say I want my hair to be blonde, don’t try and tell I would look better natural because somehow natural is better! When I leave your salon, I want to look and feel like a completely different person. I want bright blonde foils and if I develop roots in a few weeks, that’s my choice.
Don’t try and push your products on me or tell me to stop shampooing my hair because you feel my hair is too dry and course. Don’t accuse my beloved flat iron of being the cause. I have always had course, frizzy hair. I was born with it! It was a struggle growing up. My poor mom never knew how to style it. I’m truly happy that you were blessed with straight, sleek hair but I wasn’t so keep your opinions to yourself. I’ve bought every product there is and it’s not going to change my genetics!
Believe it or not, I go to a high end beauty school. I love it there. Between the students and the instructors, I walk out with exactly what I want without any judgement or advice that I flat out never asked for.
My skin is another matter. It’s a sore subject. I had teenage acne that later developed into mild but consistent adult acne. I used to use antibiotics and Proactive. It worked wonders but those products aren’t meant to be used forever. They are a temporary solution. This is another area of my life, where well-meaning people have attempted to help me. Once again, I’m in my thirties, do you not think I’ve tried all there is? I’ve used every vitamin, retinol cream and facial system on the market. I’ve spent thousands of dollars on products and still deal with acne.
Absolutely, do not advise me on allowing my skin to purge. Have you ever dealt with purging skin? Have you ever walked into work and had all of your co-workers ask you if you have a rash? I purged for six months on natural, safe products and guess what? I still have acne!
It’s not a diet issue either so don’t try and tell my it’s gluten intolerance or greasy food. I have done gluten free diets, raw juicing diets and a fermented food diets where I drank kombucha and ate kimchi. I rarely eat fast food and if I want chocolate, I’ll eat chocolate!
No, apple cider vinegar is not going to give me flawless skin. Do you want to know what apple cider vinegar did to my skin? It stunk and it made it turn red! I even tried drinking that nasty stuff and that was an experience I’d rather forget.
Do you know what would help my skin? Less stress and more sleep. So, unless you hold the key to stress-free living or provide me with a guaranteed ten hours of sleep per night, you don’t have a leg to stand on!
Kindly refrain from lecturing me on the toxicity of sunscreen. Skin cancer runs in my family so I’d rather risk putting a strong SPF on my skin then to develop melanoma from the sun. I’m not going to wear a wet suit to the beach either. I have seasonal depression. I need the sun to touch my bare skin as I meditate.
I have moles. They run in my family. They are not cancerous! Do you honestly think I don’t see them and ignore my yearly dermatologist appointment? I don’t need advice from a stranger on removing skin tags because for one thing, they aren’t skin tags. Also, why are you looking that closely to a mole on my shoulder? Honestly, that’s just weird!
If you’d like to have a deep conversation with me about life, family, books, or emotions, I’m here for you but please leave my hair and skin out of it!
